The original title of this song was "Hexapod".
In this song, there is a chord progression lifted from the movie "Antz".

--

Outside of feeling stupid for slacking and getting average grades in school, "Politics" was one of my motivations for obsessive cataloguing in my early to mid-teens.

I try to understand and validate the concerns of most people (whilst trying to root their views in evidence).
I often analyse politics from the outside.
This has alienated me many times.

This alienation, coupled with other personal issues, caused me to isolate from genuine relationships for a period (from 2017-2019, during the writing of my self-titled EP).
I tried to start socializing again, but due to unresolved issues, surrounded myself with people who would disregard me.
As some people would spin my words to dismiss and vilify me for showing scepticism, I ended up around those who would distort what I say to fit their own world-view and justify their beliefs instead.
These relationships were mostly shallow.
We would just tolerate and talk past each-other, rather than having any genuine interest in each-other as individuals.
They were unreliable when things became difficult in my personal life.

I can easily relate to others and make friends, but until recently, these were largely surface-level interactions.
Due to my experiences when disagreeing with peers/authority throughout my development, I had a fear that nuance and disagreement would push others away.
This caused a tendency to preempt abandonment by self-sabotaging relationships - usually by being abrasive, provocative or disappearing out-right.
The provocativeness or vagueness of my wording, meant I'd largely end up with people who were already decided and disregarding of what I had to say, but would tolerate me for partially agreeing.

I think this is a common theme today.
The political landscape is volatile, and the In-Group/Out-Group Us/Them dynamics are fierce.
Objectivity and consistency are harder, and double-standards & flimsy justifications are common.
Socratic Questioning and playing Devil's Advocate are seen as betrayals rather than thought exercises.

Communal Narcissism and Cluster-B Disorders are a big contributor with this.

--

My attempt to source everything is simply a fear of uncertainty and an attempt at control, due to growing-up in unstable environments.
Other means of attempting to control people's perceptions are/were:
Being vague, over-explaining things, bamboozling with complex information, attempting to predict & account for the replies of others, and preempting conflict by being abrasive, hyperbolic and provocative with my responses.

This behaviour was not exclusive to politics, but a coping mechanism for all of my relationships.
I have learned to accept that I am doing my best to speak and act in earnest.
I work hard to be accurate with my information, am always open to other's input, am always challenging my own conclusions, do my best to speak considerately but truthfully, and understand that I am allowed to make mistakes.
I know I cannot control the perceptions of others.
This has lead me to speak more clearly; ironically making my relationships easier and deeper.
People who want to listen and understand will do so, and I cannot force them.
These are the people I am more naturally surrounding myself with now, as I try to use the information I have gathered to make the lives of others around me better.
This has helped me to also cut my losses with those who are unreachable, and to have better relationships in general.